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friendships

It's good to have friends, as they can be very important to us.

Sometimes we have best friends who we are really close to and share our secret thoughts and feelings with. We can also enjoy the company of other friends as part of a group.

Sometimes it's easier to have just a few good friends and enjoy their company rather than trying to be good friends with everyone, or having just one best friend.

A friendship that is good might look like this......

...you enjoy being around them and they enjoy being around you
 ...you both share similar interests and you can have fun with them
 …you can be yourself with them and don’t have to lie or pretend stuff
…you can both have other close friends and it doesn’t matter
...you can easily talk to them, and listen to them too
...you trust them and it feels good when you are with them
 ...you know they will stick up for you and that they won’t say mean things to you, or about you
 ...it feels ok to let them know when you are happy or sad, and you know they will support you

A friendship that’s not so good might look like this…….

 …you feel like you pretend to be someone else so they will stay friends with you
…you do things that make you feel uncomfortable because you are scared they won’t like you if you don’t
…you feel like you always listen to them, but they don’t really listen to you
…they take things from you or expect you to give them things and you feel like you have to
…they say mean things to you or say mean things about you to other people
 …they don’t stand up for you or support you when things get tough
…they force you to be only be friends with them, and get angry or sad when you are with other friends
 …you have made friends with them online but they don’t want you to tell anyone
…your friend needs to know what you are doing even when you are not hanging out
…you are really scared lots of the time that your friend will stop being friends with you
 …you don’t trust your friend enough to tell them your secrets


You can tell good friends by the way they act, and not just by what they say!

How do I make friends?

Usually if you are friendly, others will be friendly back, but sometimes it can feel like you want to make friends but are finding it a little hard.  Here are some tips on getting to know people….   
….Be friendly yourself.  You can do this by asking people about themselves, and by really listening to what they are saying…and SMILE! This way people can tell that you’re interested
…Try to hang out with people you would like to have as friends, and see if you can join in with their plans or games
… Accept people as they are. We all have things that are different about us, and you can like other people even if you don't agree with every single thing they say or do
 …Get to know people well by sharing 'safe' thoughts with them first. What is a safe thought? It might be something about school or TV or your favourite footy team. It isn't always safe to tell someone very personal things about you, like things you might be worried about or afraid of. You might share those things when you know them better
 …Don't spread stories, gossip or tell tales about others, if you are not sure about what you are saying, pretend that person is standing beside you and ask yourself if you would still say it then


Remember….no one can force
another person to do something. 

If you think you have a not so
good friendship maybe think about
slowly starting to spend more and
more time with the friends who fit the
good friendship list. 


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